Saturday, July 16, 2011

So There Was An Elephant In The Parade After All!

Though many did not see it, and it certainly did not quite live up to its 9,000 pound billing, it looks like the 4th of July Parade Committee did have an elephant in the parade after all. Proving to one and all that they did not succumb to all those ruffians in town whose agenda differed so greatly from their own. And thanks to a sharp eyed reader with some pretty neat camera skills, we can now show it to you.

If you click or tap on the photo at the top of this post it will enlarge quite a bit. This is the inflatable triceratops that, according to Susan Henderson in a Looney Views News article published in last week's edition, rolled in the
place of Tai the Elephant in our 4th of July Parade. Which, believe it or not, is now 12 days ago. Time in thy flight, as they say.

And if you look at the very tip of this creature's middle horn (just above Mr. T-Top's mouth) you will notice what appears to be a child's small stuffed animal.

Using the vast array of advanced computer technology and know-how available to us at a branch office of The Tattler organization, we have enhanced the image of that small stuffed animal, and discovered that it is indeed an elephant! Which I guess means that, at least on a symbolic level, the 4th of July Parade Committee did have an elephant in the parade after all. Though, and unlike the elephant originally scheduled, this one was able to perform its stunt through the use of a piece of tape, and not the medieval methods employed by the owners of Tai.

Say what you will about our 4JPC, they are quite the sassy bunch.

Carmaggedon is positively unhinging some people

As we have all heard ad nauseum these last few weeks, the visionaries who deal with freeway maintenance have decided to close down the 405 for the weekend so they can demolish a bridge they built a few years ago. This is expected to cause cataclysmic traffic jams that could possibly lead to the end of civilization in the Los Angeles basin as we know it. I hope you've stocked up a lot of bottled water and things to eat.

And just how bad is it for some people? Thanks to the kindness of a friend, we have now obtained a video of a notorious 20th Century political leader from deep inside his bunker somewhere beneath Redondo Beach. His anger at the impending closure of the 405 is apoplectic, to say the least. And we must warn you, if you choose to view this video, you will observe subtitles depicting some very salty language. Which we can only assume is due to the extreme stress being experienced by this individual. Fortunately it is spoken in a foreign lingo.

To view this video (and the ad that precedes it), click here.

Have a great weekend. And avoid the South Bay if you can.

http://sierramadretattler.blogspot.com

48 comments:

  1. The Fourth of July Committee is indeed sassy. Also unconscious and in denial.

    What is that? A little wink and nod to animal abuse?

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  2. That fits. That's how the 4JPC likes their elephants. Tiny, fuzzy, and having nothing to do with reality.

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  3. Being special means never having to say you're sorry.

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  4. they do not represent Sierra MadreJuly 16, 2011 at 7:49 AM

    It's all about the show, folks.
    Be happy with what you see on the shiny surface and never mind about the rot underneath.

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  5. Apparently the Farmers' Market was an astounding unsuccess! 8 People showed up to buy overpriced fruits and vegetables, and cheap clothing, jewelry, purses and bags, and T-shirts. Face painting for $5.00 and music provided the entertainment.

    And this is going to go on for five years?

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  6. You can't hang this on the Community Services folks, 7:59 am. They recommended against it with good reason.

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  7. Were the seniors there with those $20 coupons? Nancy said they were a-clamoring to buy peas in an outdoor setting.

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  8. The 4JPC and the Farmers' Market are brought to you by the Bosca family and the Special People Government of Sierra Madre.

    Always looking out for the children and seniors.

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  9. Perhaps Nancy was misquoted. She could have meant that seniors were clamoring to pee in an outdoor setting meaning the Kodiaks should have skylights.

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  10. Everything is beautiful in the special world. Can't you all just be as happy as they are?

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  11. A lot of the mushrooms sold at the Farmers Market are grown right beneath the Kodiak.

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  12. Q) How do you get Joe Mosca out of a tree?

    A) Wave with both hands.

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  13. The addition of the toy elephant to the dinosaur was a crass and totally juvenile expression of the Prom Committee's lack of both sense and sensibility.

    If I were on the committee or in that photo I would personally apologize. Or just know that people see the juvenility at your core.

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  14. Hey Bucky, Very Funny!July 16, 2011 at 9:04 AM

    I guess we'll just have to be shocked by this too. Although all in all, a small expression of a cruel intention is less disgusting than an entire Cumquat not to mention the other (unmentionable) Buchanan-Approved Publication.

    You are surely the chosen one. It must be such a burden to be THE GOVERNOR.

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  15. The Prom Committee operates at a level that can only be understood through the heavy consumption of mixed drinks. If you don't get pie-eyed drunk on a Tuesday evening, or a Wednesday, or any of those other nights, then you really aren't good enough for them. Elephant on horn, lamp shade on head.

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  16. "The elephant in the parade," is an apt metaphor for what the dirts and dics are trying to do to the town. In the civil name of "duty" and "progress," they are trying to force the beast of development down our shady quiet streets.

    Next time Boscachanan says we need to tear down a church, or build a homeless shelter, or gentrify Montecito, or double our population, I'll be thinking "They're trying to get another elephant into the parade."

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  17. Some of the 4th of July Comms were wearing little elephant buttons at the parade. Must have been a gang sign.

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  18. There are lots of elephants floating around these day, 9:23. Thanks for that insight.

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  19. Try to see it their way.
    They were doing charitable good deeds, spreading compassion and kindness with generosity and wisdom, promoting the beauty of the village that is so near and dear to all our hearts, and some insane animal rights protestors were going to come and bring chaos with them. Poor, poor oppressed and misunderstood Fourth of July Committee! They are the ones who were abused.
    Yes, they were the victims.

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  20. Yeah, they had an elephant. They also had four buffoons in dressed up as council members.

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  21. That video re: 405 closure is hilarious. KFI has brought in all their top guns to cover the national news (the closure of the freeway) and they are talking about anything but the 405, since there is nothing to report.

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  22. All the crap that is going on in this country now, and what does our great and vigilant news establishment talk about all day? The 405 closing. No wonder everything is going down the tubes.

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  23. I'll bet you that the committee that was so very ignorant about the condition of Tai and other animals at Have trunk Will Travel made a whole lot of jokes about stuffed animal rights. Arrogant and ignorant.

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  24. Just heard mayor V say that with the new HOV lane, drivers will save a minute a mile. How is that possible? If you drive 60 miles per hour ....that is a minute a mile. So if you can now drive say 30 mph you will need to drive 90 mph to save a minute a mile. I thought the speed limit was 65 mph.. LOL

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  25. Villaraigosa is LA's Joe Mosca. Light in the noodle and genetically dishonest.

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  26. 12:14, also they are well groomed with bright smiles.

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  27. the 4th of July parade has just gottten cheesy and poorly run since Matt Bossypants stuck his nose in it

    just like Mosca, Bossypants snapped his fingers and decided that despite 100 years of history, Sierra Madre wasn't to his liking and weasled his way into committees to make the parade a shell of it's former self

    the past two years I've tossed the donation envelope in the trash and as long as Mosca/Bossy are around, I'll never donate

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  28. I didn't go to the Farmer's Market but wanted to walk around it with my Taylors bag full of produce.

    Was it as successful as the previous Farmer's Market?

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  29. If you haven't experienced buying cabbage under a California moon, then you haven't lived. It's right up there with watching your lawn grow.

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  30. exactly what was the point of the inflatable dinasour?

    spend $ 5,000 on a elephant and pull it when you get exposed for being stupid

    then spend a couple more hundred dollars on an inflatable toy and flaunt it to the public

    we need a new 4th of July committee, childish brats heading this one and we should all not donate with this kind of fiscal moronic brats running the show, especially as disorganized as it's been

    hey, here's an idea, focus on the true theme and stop making it a sideshow for your own nutty agendas and try figuring out how to run the event smoothly and not as haphazard as it's been the last 3 or 4 years

    and also, get rid of all the political candidates and out of town realtors

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  31. The Farmers Market better have been a success. Otherwise imagine the meetings in the corporate offices of Raw Inspiration:
    You mean even when we gave away $20 certificates, they didn't come? How much is this boondoggle gonna cost us?

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  32. "Mayor says drivers save a minute per mile" 11:54AM

    Mayor V fancies himself the savior of the freeways. Before the Academy Awards, he told CalTrans to move some traffic cones around a little bit-- and then called himself 'The Mayor that Saved the Oscars'.

    I say we dub him "Oscar Mayor" and give him the Giant Wiener-mobile to drive around in.

    Our 4JPC can navigate for him. With any luck, that will be the last we'll see of the whole bunch.

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  33. Lobbyists call people like Villaraigosa and Mosca "snack cake." They just eat them up like so many scooter pies.

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  34. 1:29 PM: Yes, good definition of political snack cakes:

    Scooter pies for lobbyists, and cow pies for townspeople.

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  35. Our grinning LA Mayor suffers from "RPS", restless p---s syndrom that becomes activated when he encounters tv anchorettes. Never mind his wife of many years.

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  36. Is it just me or is the new city website really dumbed down?

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  37. Hysterical youtube.

    Thanks Sir Eric.

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  38. Losing value on your Disney Dollars is no laughing matter.

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  39. I survived Carmageddon. Yes, it is true. Had to take Boy 2 to his "Impact Basketball League" game in Panarama City. Which is very different from Sierra Madre. Took the 101 to the 405 N and right onto Roscoe Boulevard. All paved ways about as wide open as I have ever seen. They should do this more often.

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  40. Well, some elephants go way past Dumbo at Disneyland!

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  41. 7:24 PM You are right! Although, they tried to make it easier to navigate, the search function pulls up a lot of irrelevant information. When I tried to locate the police blotter, I got the annual reports from the last 5 years of the PD but no blotter. I guess they have now switched over to a new system in which you can see the map of crimes, but it doesn't give specifics. Also, you get spam warnings when trying to locate city e-mail addresses.

    In addition, there are many malapropisms. Someone should have proofread the entire site. Or maybe they did but the wine tastings were BEFORE the proofreading and navigation sessions!

    Good use of tax dollars Sierra Madre!

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  42. Just give me the reports, dammitJuly 17, 2011 at 12:17 PM

    The new city site is supposed to improve citizen trust through greater transparency. What we have received so far is some fluffy feel good nonsense centered between vast stretches of unfilled white spaces. Bordered by Wistaria colored graphics, I guess. They must think the residents of this town would rather have a lollipop than staff reports.

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  43. Had to go to Thousand Oaks yesterday (Saturday) After checking the internet drove down the 210 to the 134 to the 101. Never made a quicker trip. Absolutely no slowdown at the Hollywood Frwy interchange and the 405 interchange.

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  44. I also just want the reports.
    During the presentation of the new website, the library director said that it was a question of cost, paying for the time to upload the reports. So that's why the council has to take care of it, and Bonds Buchanan said they were working on it.
    You'd think they could pay the extra staff time with CRA funds in order to remove the blight caused by untrustworthy council members.

    The search engine is frustrating. I was looking for the schedule of the Fridays city hall was closed and never did find it.

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  45. I think the new city site is just some public relations consultant's cooked up solution to problematic residents. The old city site was far superior. This one is like trying to find a single shred of truth in the Mountain Views News.

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  46. Yeah, Rich. I think the next time Chicken Little starts screaming about the sky falling, half of L.A. County is going to fire up their flivvers and head for the highway.

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  47. 12:17, that's the hallmark of the Special People Party - fluff.
    Wisteria fluff.

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  48. Don't you worry your silly little head, resident. Go taste some wine, or buy a nice peasant blouse at the farmers market. We have everything under control, just for you.

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