Former Hippies Put in Horrible Position of Rooting for the F.B.I. (The New Yorker link): WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Former hippies across the United States have been put in the unbearable position of rooting for the F.B.I., hippies have confirmed. From Vermont to California, erstwhile hippies bemoaned a nightmare scenario that has forced them to side with a law-enforcement agency they have despised since the Summer of Love.
“I always dreamed I’d spend my retirement surrounded by my grandchildren, telling them that the F.B.I. were fascist pigs,” Carol Foyler, a former hippie who lives in Santa Cruz, said. “That dream has been shot to hell.”
Her husband, Mick, nodded his head in sad agreement. “We were so happy when pot was legalized in California,” he said. “But the fact that we’re now on the same side as the F.B.I. has ruined even that.”
Now in their seventies, the Foylers are spending their days doing things they never dreamed possible when they traipsed through the mud at Woodstock: going door to door in Santa Cruz, asking other former freaks to sign a pro-F.B.I. petition.
“Donald Trump has wrecked America’s standing around the world, spread misogyny and bigotry, ravaged the environment, and endorsed a child molester,” Carol said. “But making people like us support the F.B.I. is the most unforgivable thing he’s done.”
Mod: That is far out. But what follows is a really harsh toke.
The 2.5% drop — the largest points plunge since the 2008 recession — came after several American business behemoths, including Exxon Mobil and Google's parent company Alphabet, reported weak earnings.
Investors have recently grown concerned that a rapid rise in interest rates, exacerbated by higher inflation, could derail the market's otherwise steady upswing. They have also worried that the Federal Reserve would respond to the rising inflation by hiking interest rates quicker than expected.
Those predictions appeared to materialize Friday, with the 10-year Treasury note, a benchmark for many kinds of loans, including mortgages, climbing to 2.85%, the highest in about four years.
Mod: That could explain the unseasonably warm weather we've been having.
You might want to throw this guy Janz a couple of bucks
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